Wednesday, 22 February 2012

Two-Sh*t Sam...

Two-sh*t Sams.  We all know at least one.  You know the kind of person I’m talking about, right?  If you’ve had a bad day, their day was worse.  If you’re feeling under the weather, they’ve just come home from the hospital.  If you know a little about a topic, they’ve suddenly got encyclopaedic knowledge. If you’ve done one sh*t, they’ve done two.

Yep.  Two-sh*t Sams (TSS).   They’re more sick, more successful, more knowledgeable, just more everything.

And I’ve been one.   Every now and again.  And the minute I recognise what I’m doing, I stop.  Mid-sentence.  Because in my humble opinion, it’s a tad rude to TSS someone when they’re telling you something about their life.  I would not be offended if any of my friends stopped me mid-rave and simply said “is that right TSS?”  Truly.  I would be humbled into silence.  And maybe later I could choke out a mortified apology.

I accept that most of the time people don’t realise they’re actually doing this, because we call get carried away when someone's telling us something and we think "hey, I've got a similar story to this!" I get that.  I accept that.  What I'm referring to, is when it's consistently one-upping people.  Like, every. single. time.

So I understand, I totally get it - communicating is a two-way street, but check yourself every now and again.  Are you TSS'ing people?  And more importantly, are you doing it consistently?  Because if you are, chances are you’re so engrossed in impressing upon people your awesome story that you've missed the rolled eyes, the sighs and the casual glancing away from you as you steamroll your way into your bigger and better story. 

So tell me.  Tell me, tell me.  Do you know anyone like this?

Image: renjith krishnan /


  1. Well do tell me if I ever try to one-up you!!! I hope I haven't - well, I don't on purpose. I do recall raving about my migraines, but they are bloody severe. Apart from that I don't think I have. I suppose it's rather patronising isn't it? To say, well, whatever, this shit that I'm dealing with is way worse... I do know a few people that if you've got dramas, they've got 10 times as many and 10 times as severe dramas going on in their lives- and then you wish there was a rock to hide behind lest you be rude & tell them to take 50c, and call someone who cares.... Anyway, rambling again.

  2. How true it is that there is alawys one tss in every group, one at every party or dinner table! The one with TSS syndrome is just as bad, if not worse than the one with keeping up with the jones' syndrome. There should be a national day where everyone stops the TSS in their tracks and says " hey stop being so self absorbed", it would be a national day for educating the selfish! Love your blog babe

    1. Amen Sista! Love that idea - national anti-TSS day :) Gold. Thanks for feedback & thanks for following xx


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